Letter to you


how are you? I hope you're okay. Ya know, I miss you. My life isn't the same without you.

I always talked to you. If I got problems, a crush on someone or just a fight with mum. You had always listened.

I remember the early times when I was young and you take more care of me, than my mom did.  I tell you something: I needed 2 years to tell you what I tell you today.

I was so angry that day you went to Grandpa and dad. I thought: Why the hell did she left me behind?!

You know there was a very difficult time for me, I was depressiv and aggressiv. You were my hold, my rock who saved me.

Now... you're gone and you can not return. I could say: I hate you. But I love you too much for ever think about it. Sometimes, when all things are going wrong, I hear your voice telling me: "You gonna be okay, girl. You gonna be okay!" Each time I hear you I feel like a feather blowing up by the wind. Then, I smell you and feel you around me. I wear your ring, Granny. The wonderful white with the blue stone. It's my luckycharm.

I know you alwyas believed in me. You were my bond to my sisters. You were our bond. When we got problems, we alwyas could tell you. Even if I was more than 900km away... You were always around me.

Thank you for being there, thank you for your trust, your believe, your heart. Thank you for growing me up, for teaching me how to cook and to bake, to wash my clothes and how to handle money. Thank you for teaching me politeness, regard and good manners. Thank you for teaching me for life. For show me both sides of the coin.

I'll never forget you. You were the most important person in my life. And every year on the march 7th, I spark a candle for you.

I love you, Granny.

(In Memorian by Negative)

I wish that I would be dead,
dead like you and I
falling like a butterfly,
after one lived day.
Hope you will find your peace
immortal, eternal and real
I know I cannot be dead yet,
just can't live it again.

I hope you're waiting for me somwhere out there,
in a place where we can hold each other again.
You went first I'll come right after you I'm depressed I don't care.
I miss you, I hope you hear me.

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